Discover more from The Grappler's Diary
25 Life Lessons For My 25th Birthday
Is this the year that everyone finally stops saying I’m a kid?
On Sunday, I’ll be turning 25.
This week, I’ve got a different kind of article for you. It’s shorter than most of my articles, but it honestly took a bit more thought and research than most of the stuff I publish here. I had to think about the whole last year.
365 days is kind of a long time.
Usually, I try to make this newsletter stories that I’ve experienced and the lessons that I’ve learned from those stories.
The thing is, most of those stories I’ve already shared at some point. So, instead of sharing instead the normal long essay about life, Jiu-Jitsu, or stupid things I’ve done, I just thought I’d leave you with the 25 most important lessons that I’ve learned this last year.
Hope you enjoy 😊
25 life lessons I’ve learned in the last year:
Talk a little less, listen a little more.
Key to success: work smarter, and also work really fucking hard. Do both. Most people can’t.
Your doubts ain’t shit.
Rankings, seeds, followers, and all those other vanity metrics don’t mean anything. Ignore them.
Mind games are an act of war. Do not allow them in your personal life.
Writing will make you the most self-aware version of yourself. Too much writing is not good for you.
A lack of money will damage your dreams. A lack of hope will kill them.
Forgiveness without genuine compassion is a sign of weakness.
Anxiety and creativity are like water and oil. Pick one.
In the long run, too much work is the equivalent of not working.
The best remedy for heartbreak is time. Everything else is a band-aid.
People say great art comes from pain. This idea is self-fulfilling.
Social media is becoming less and less “social” as time goes on.
Passion is not a viable excuse to allow instability or manipulation into your life. Don’t always trust your feelings. Trust your gut.
Being misunderstood is not a reason to give up. Try again, and this time, communicate more effectively.
Happy people build other people up. Sad people bring other people down. People try to make other people feel the way they do. If you don’t do this, you will become a better person.
Pleasure is not a problem, but an obsession with pursuing pleasure is the biggest problem.
On paper, optimism doesn’t really make sense. Be an optimist anyway.
Travel is fun and it might make you have interesting stories at dinner parties or barbecues, but moving your body around the world won’t make you much happier in the long run.
The right story at the right time can change your life. The right story at the wrong time will sound pretentious.
“The wisdom which a wise man tries to communicate always sounds foolish.” — Herman Hesse, Siddhartha. This is not an excuse to stop writing or trying to help.
What’s obvious to you is revolutionary to someone else.
“We’ve known each other a long time” isn’t a good reason to stay friends with someone.
“Goodbye” doesn’t mean “I hate you”. It means goodbye.
That’s all as far lessons go. Some of those might be obvious to you, but 12 months ago, I didn’t know any of these things. I learned a lot this year. Life looks really different now in more ways than I can explain.
Here’s to wishing my future self luck in trying to find 26 even better lessons for next year. It’s time to get going.
If you’d like to read the lessons I learned at 24, here’s that article:
What I’m working on…
I’m excited to officially announce 2 new projects that I will be putting out over the next few months (mostly writing these to make sure I don’t get cold feet and not finish them 😅):
My first Jiu-Jitsu instructional course: I always wanted to film a Jiu-Jitsu instructional, but it’s always been more of a fantasy than a goal. I never thought anyone would actually want to learn things from me. Last week, I decided “fuck it”, and I’m going to make one. I’m really excited to share this instructional. More info on it coming soon.
I’ll also be releasing an essay collection in book format this fall. The book will contain 20 essays that I’ve never shared before on life, mental health, martial arts, and growing up. I’ve put a lot of work into these essays and gone against my urges to publish them on Medium or Quora, and I’m excited to share them for the first time.
Lastly, here’s something I did this week:
I was a guest on Tristian Diablik’s podcast, Adversity Kings a few weeks back and the episode dropped just the other day. If you’d like to listen to me talk about Jiu-Jitsu, mental health, life, and writing, you’ll definitely get a kick out of this episode.
Here’s the link so you don’t have to look for it:
That’s all for this week. Have a great weekend. 😊